I keep a list of potential blog story topics stored in my phone. Whenever something pops into my head, I add it to the list for future reference so I always have some topics ready when I’m at a loss. More often than not though, I write spontaneously like I did with today’s post…
THE STORY
…I’ll see, hear or read something interesting; or maybe something happens that amuses, irritates or interests me…and so I write. Such was the case with this post.
Yesterday I took the day off work to take my husband to an appointment with a spinal specialist. He was badly injured at work back in May and I wrote about it shortly thereafter. He still isn’t back to work and is unable to do even the most basic of activities. It’s rare that we go anywhere because he is in constant pain and walking, even with his cane and brace, only exacerbates it. Physical therapy made absolutely no improvement and when the orthopedic surgeon was at a loss he sent us to the spinal specialist whom we saw yesterday.
I was cautiously optimistic in that I hoped that maybe this would be the doctor who found out why the issues persist…maybe this would be the appointment that would get us at least on the road back to some semblance of a normal life. All I can say is that it’s a damn good thing I was cautious about my optimism because otherwise I would have left the doctor’s office sorely disappointed. Instead I left highly pissed off.
I understand that we unfortunately live in an age where a whole lot of people are looking to take the easy way out and milk the system, whether it be through worker’s compensation, disability or public assistance. I get that and I know firsthand that it is reality. Sometimes it is overlooked though that there are a whole lot of other people out there who are legitimately injured, legitimately in pain and who would more than anything, love to resume a normal life, including going back to work. I feel like it goes without saying that my husband is part of the latter group.
Unfortunately the doctor that we saw yesterday apparently paints everyone with the same biased brush. He looked at my husband’s records and previous tests, did two x-rays and gave him nothing more than a cursory once over that was supposed to pass as an examination. He offhandedly ordered an MRI like some sort of consolation prize.
I believe that he saw that it was a worker’s compensation case, and before him was a patient who by all rights should have by now shown improvement yet hasn’t, and thus took it upon himself to pass judgement. He looked at us both with eyes that said we were less than…that we were liars; it’s been a lot of years since I felt so dismissed by another human being.
I left there feeling angry, frustrated and close to tears. Something is wrong with my husband, very wrong. Just because whatever it is isn’t visible, just because there are no clear medical answers that does not make it any less real; that does not mean that it’s make believe. For God’s sake, we can’t even sleep in the same bed together because it causes him too much pain…who in their right mind would make that up?
We met our son and his fiancé for coffee after the appointment and my boy asked why I kept my mouth shut because that is so unlike me to do so. Do you know what? I really didn’t have an answer for him…manners? respect? Both of those ring hollow though in light of the fact the man treated my husband so poorly. Honestly, after some self-psychoanalyzing, I think that the doctor’s behavior was unexpected, and it took me to a place in my head where the scared 12 year old girl still lives. Back then I was treated like that on the daily because I came from a poor family that lived in the trailer park. I never used to defend myself because I was intimidated, and for a hot second in that doctor’s office I forgot who I really am today.
This isn’t a “woe is me” thing; I just know how my brain works that’s all. The good doctor sneak attacked and knocked me off my game. Rest assured, when we go back for the follow up after the MRI…the doctor will be schooled. No one has the right to treat another human being as “less than”. No one has the right to simply dismiss another because they are looking at them through their own jaded eyes. I do not care how many degrees that a person has, nor do I care how many people they have seen who were indeed scamming the system. Everyone deserves to be treated with dignity and respect until if/when they prove that they are undeserving. Especially when people are coming to you for help…for answers….for hope. And if one chooses to treat me and mine otherwise? Then one will be held accountable.
THE OUTFIT
I’ve had this particular chambray shirtdress from Old Navy for years…and I’ve worn it maybe twice. Try as I might, I just can’t make myself love shirtdresses. I’m not sure why, but for some reason they are just not my thang. Instead of donating it though, I decided to style it as a duster instead and I think it worked out pretty well if I do say so myself.
I styled it over my camo skinny jeans and a white tee for work. It made for the perfect butt coverage, because…you know, dress code. I figured I wouldn’t make for the best role model if I was sitting in the principal’s office with all of the other inappropriately clad children.
Adding the shirtdress/duster is a perfect example of how just one little tweak to an outfit (or the addition of a third piece) can make all the difference. The tee, jeans and ankle boots would have been cute enough on their own, albeit a bit basic. But throw on the shirtdress, and voila…an outfit that’s both interesting and work appropriate.
THE TIP
When looking at pieces in your closet, or when shopping, try thinking outside of the box. Unloved pieces might get a second chance at life or perhaps a piece that you love, but for some reason doesn’t quite work could possibly be worn in an entirely different way…
- A beautiful scarf can be artfully wrapped as a top or skirt
- On the other hand a lightweight chiffon vest or top can be used as a scarf like I did with this look.
- Style a dress over jeans or skinny pants like you would a top.
- Style a shirtdress as a duster or vice versa like I when I wore my plaid duster as a dress.
- Try tying a shirt around your hips/waist for definition and visual interest instead of wearing it as a shirt.
THE LINK UPS
Check out the weekly link ups I participate in for even more fashion and style ideas…
Shirtdress: Similar; Jeans: Similar; Tee: Nordstrom (Similar); Boots: Aldo (Similar)
