Opinions are an unavoidable part of the human experience…
THE STORY
…Personal opinions can be a good thing. Each of us has opinions about pretty much every thing that we come in contact with. Opinions are how we determine our likes and dislikes; our wants and needs; the careers we choose; the activities that we enjoy…all of these things are at least in part, based upon our unique personal opinions.
Some opinions though, the opinions that involve other people, those are the one’s that can lead us into sketchy territory if we aren’t careful. There’s a very fine line, if there’s a line at all, between opinions and judgments. Judgments, like opinions, are simply a part of being human. We all do it whether we like to admit it or not. And that’s okay. What’s not okay is spewing those opinions haphazardly and without regard to to the feelings of others. Whether it’s intentional or not, verbalizing our negative opinions/judgments in regard to some aspect of another person, whether it be their beliefs, thoughts or appearance is pretty much never acceptable. Intentional cruelty is quite simply not cool.
The situation that precipitated this post happened to me last weekend while I was shopping with my husband. We were browsing through a rack of down vests when my attention was caught by a rather loud older woman (older than me) talking at her husband. I say talking “at” because he was just aimlessly following her around and not responding. I’m not sure what caught my attention, but I tuned in when she began her rant about how women dress.
The particular bone that she apparently felt the need to pick was a topic that will raise my hackles every time…what is “appropriate” and “inappropriate” for a woman to wear. It went something like this…”I just don’t understand why some women dress the way that they do. Why would a grown woman want to wear something that is meant for a girl? Someone who does that is just trying to convince people that she’s younger than she actually is. Women seriously need to dress their age.” Cue to me looking down at my usual weekend uniform of ripped jeans, an American Eagle hoodie and embroidered denim jacket…
Now this woman fully had my attention. I stopped what I was doing and just stood there looking at her dressed in what a stereotypical woman in her 60’s would wear while she continued to spout off her ridiculous nastiness. She never once glanced in my direction so I couldn’t determine with 100% certainty that her comments were directed at me. Had I been 100% certain, trust me, the comments would not have gone unanswered. I hold internet trolls accountable and it would not have been any different in real life. Was she entitled to her opinion? Sure. Was she entitled to make someone else feel bad because of it. Absolutely not. Even if it wasn’t directed at me personally, anyone in a 20 foot radius could here her, and the ugliness she was putting out there could have really done someone harm.
Me? Not so much. I could honestly not give one sh*t about what people think of my clothing choices. I dress for me. I dress to make myself happy. I am not trying to be someone that I’m not, nor am I trying to pretend that I’m 25. I’m simply being me. And if someone doesn’t like it? Tough. When my first response was to look down at what I was wearing it was not in shame or embarrassment. It was more like, hmmm…is this the kind of outfit you’re talking about you sad angry creature? Whether or not she was talking about me I’ll never know, but I did make sure to circle around and position myself directly in her line of sight so that she could enjoy the full unencumbered view of a 53 year old woman wearing shredded jeans and a hoodie from American Eagle.
Here’s the thing…my comment above was a little judge-y in regard to her appearance, but had she not opened her mouth I wouldn’t have noticed her and if I had, I wouldn’t have thought twice about what she was wearing. Why? Because what she was wearing was her own damn business. It did not matter one iota whether or not I liked it as long as she did. Although once she got nasty all bets were off and my snarkiness came out, but guess what? I didn’t voice my thoughts out loud because intentional ignorance is not an activity that I actively indulge in.
There is no expiration date on style. There are no laws in regard to where one can shop based upon age. I wear things from Forever 21 and American Eagle just like my 14 year old daughter wears pieces from the ANA line at JCPenney. I wear pieces from the Wild Fable line at Target just as she wears pieces from the Who What Wear line. Fashion is reciprocal; it’s fluid. There are no boundaries and the edges are blurred. My daughter is free to wear “older” clothes just as I’m free to wear “younger” clothes because quite honestly, there is no “older” or “younger”. There is simply clothes. Clothes that we love or clothes that we hate. Clothes that are, in our own personal opinions, fabulous and we feel fabulous in them. And no one ever has the right to make us feel less than fabulous.
THE OUTFIT
I was lucky enough to happen upon these awesome vintage Levi’s overalls last month when I took my daughter shopping in Pittsburgh for a vintage homecoming dress. I found them at a cool little shop called Highway Robbery Vintage, and I was so excited when I tried them on and they fit perfectly.
Since the overalls are cropped I knew they would be perfect for showing off my cute little lace trimmed fishnet anklets that I received from Berkshire. I’ve worked with Berkshire a number of times over the last several years, and I’ve come to love their tights and hosiery. I pretty much purchase all of my hose and tights from them now.
I first tried their anklets last Spring when I styled them with my yellow slingbacks. They are an easy way to try out the socks with pumps or sandals look since they are not quite the thickness of a regular pair of socks. I love how this lace trimmed pair looks with sandals. The only problem that I discovered with this particular pair is that they don’t stay up well, although I’ve found that to be the case with most fishnet anklets. Fortunately they look just as cute when they scrunch around the ankle. All of their anklets are the perfect weight for when the weather is too cool for bare feet with sandals.
This time they sent me a great selection of tights and hosiery as well. I can’t wait to try the plush lined Cozy Hose once the full-on cold weather hits. They are footless which makes them even more comfortable then standard tights, but they also come in a version with feet if that’s your preference.
THE TIP
I know that it might be a leap, but consider giving socks with pumps or sandals a try. I’m not talking tube socks with Birkenstocks. I’m talking about a cute little pair of anklets like the fishnets that I’m wearing today, or perhaps a mesh pair like I wore with a velvet skirt to the ballet last Christmas. The pairing is unexpected, surprisingly easy to pull off and actually quite pretty. Plus there’s the added bonus of a little extra warmth for your feet once the weather cools off.
THE LINK UPS
Check out the weekly link ups I participate in for even more fashion and style ideas…
Overalls: Vintage (Similar); Tee: Similar; Sandals: JCPenney; Anklets: c/o Berkshire
