All right my friends, it’s time for a serious blatantly honest heart to heart…
THE STORY
…About what you ask? Body image; more specifically, body image and self-confidence. I had been considering writing about it when I happened upon my friend Paula’s (Dimples On My What) Instagram post about that very topic. After reading her post I decided to share my thoughts.
The main reason I had been hesitant was because the last thing I wanted was to appear as if I was fishing for compliments. Believe me, no compliments are necessary because like I commented on Paula’s post, no matter how the rest of the world sees us, we often see ourselves in an entirely different light and no amount of extrinsic praise is going to change that.
I’ve been struggling in recent weeks to find pictures that I actually wanted to post both on the blog and on Instagram because since last May I’ve gained an even 10 pounds, which on a tiny girl translates to quite a bit of excess bulk. When my life goes off the rails for whatever reason, my eating typically follows suit.
My clothes aren’t fitting right and I feel, well, icky. I don’t like how I look in photos and I don’t like how I feel in my clothes. Yes, I understand that at my current size/weight I’m considerably smaller than the the average woman. However that does not change the fact that I simply do not feel good in my own skin right now. I’m not my best self.
I’m all for body positivity; it’s truly a goal we should all aspire to. The key word there is “aspire”. It is simply unrealistic and impossible to feel good about ourselves all of the time, and friends, there is nothing wrong with that. We shouldn’t be ashamed to admit that we feel beautiful, but by the same token, we shouldn’t feel ashamed to admit that sometimes we just feel gross.
This isn’t some big hatin’ on myself pity party. I still know that I’m intelligent, I have a killer (albeit immature) sense of humor, I am blessed with beautiful hair, my nails are always perfectly manicured and the definition in my calf muscles is fierce even when I’m carrying extra poundage. I do see the good, but I am not going to lie to myself or the world about the things that make me unhappy for the sake of feigning a positive body image. I don’t obsess over it 24/7, but I do recognize it for what it is and now I have to work to fix it. I know what changes I have to make and I know how to make them.
In time I’ll get myself back to where I am comfortable. Until then, I will hear my bitchy thoughts, acknowledge my negative feelings, then toss my fabulous hair, move on with my day and enjoy my life. So just remember, if you aren’t feeling great about some aspect of yourself that is perfectly okay. If it seems like everyone you see is feeling all sorts of “body positive” about themselves remind yourself that no one, and I mean NO ONE ever feels as beautiful as the rest of the world perceives them to be.
The reality of it is we all have bad days, bad weeks, bad months; we all have insecurities of one flavor or another. Make it a point to focus on whatever it is that you love about yourself, work on improving what you don’t and try not to criticize yourself too harshly. And most importantly, keep this in mind…the size of your ass does not determine the size of your life.
THE OUTFIT
This particular outfit is kind of a “boho for beginners” look. Or maybe it’s for the women out there who like the idea of boho, but are skittish about the full “rock n’ roll gypsy chick at an 80’s music festival in the woods” look that I typically adorn myself in.
The boho print midi dress, braided belt and wood heeled sandals are all definitely giving off a bohemian vibe, however the cut of the dress and the straps of the sandals give it a more mainstream feel. Mainstream as in this is what I wore to Open House at school a few weeks back. Trust me, I didn’t intentionally tone it down, these were just the pieces that for whatever reason spoke to me when I was perusing my closet. The turquoise, rust and cream tones lend themselves well to brown accessories like the belt and sandals I paired it with here.
The first time that I wore this dress I styled it with more of a western flavor and some layers since it was early spring. Like most of my dresses it will work just as well in the winter with a chunky sweater, tights and boots.
THE TIP
If a particular style interests you, but you just want to dip your toes in the water then tone it down a bit so that you aren’t overwhelmed. You can use prints, colors and accessories to add just a hint of a particular style like I did with this look. The print is definitely bohemian, but the cut of the dress and sandals are more middle of the road.
THE LINK UPS
Check out the weekly link ups I participate in for even more fashion and style ideas…
Dress: Similar; Sandals: Similar; Belt: Similar
