I used to be, for the most part, a rule follower in every aspect of my life…
THE STORY
…I blindly followed basically all of the rules that those around me or perhaps society as a whole had put into place. I never questioned them, and if I did, it was only silently in my head. Because that’s what good girls did…and everybody wants to be a good girl, right?
Rules typically serve one of two purposes: 1.) To protect you from something not good for you, or 2.) To nudge you towards something beneficial for you. We need to keep in mind however, that rules are typically made by those who are in some way in power; and those who have power over us do not always have our best interests at heart. Rules made in this vein are meant to control or limit us in some way, and that obviously, is no bueno.
As I got older (and wiser), I realized that so many of those “rules” were complete and utter bullsh*t. I’m not talking about rules that exist for the greater good. For example, using basic manners in social situations. Greeting people, saying “please” and “thank you” and holding the door for the person behind you are quite simply rules that we all should follow to make the world a more pleasant place.
“I am referring to rules that are meant to hold us back or silence our voices in some way; these are the rules that need to be broken because the only way to make change happen is to shatter the status quo.”
Once I became aware of the bullsh*t rules I became somewhat of a rebel…a rule breaker…a disrupter. It started with how I dressed and as my confidence grew so did my inability to follow rules, both spoken and unspoken, just because I was “expected” to follow them. I began to question things…the why’s, the how’s, the what if’s. Being a rule breaker isn’t easy, it takes courage. If I’m being completely honest there are still unspoken rules in my world that need to be addressed. Some rules are more challenging to break free from than others, but I know that in order to live my truth, in time, these rules too will have to be broken.
“By all means, break the rules, and break them beautifully, deliberately, and well.” —Robert Bringhurst
One important thing to keep in mind though is this…it makes absolutely no sense to break rules just for the sake of breaking them. There’s a fine line between being a rebel and a troublemaker.
There are two guiding principles to consider before breaking a rule…
First, consider the outcome. The outcome is always more important than the rule itself. How will it affect you? How will it affect others? Are the consequences worth breaking the rule? If it’s worth it and no harm will come to you or others, then shatter that damn rule.
Second, do not compromise your values. If you choose to break (or not) a rule, will you be able to sleep at night? If the outcome aligns with your values and core beliefs then you know what you need to do.
Tell me…are you a rule breaker or a rule follower?
THE OUTFIT
In my humble opinion, so called “fashion rules” are completely ridiculous. Yes, there are certain situation-specific rules we need to follow (think work, funeral, certain social events, etc). Generally speaking though, fashion rules are meant in some way to stifle our individuality, the expression of our true selves…and most often they target women…more specifically, women who have passed some arbitrary birthday.
With that in mind, when my good friend Bettye chose “Rules Are Made To Be Broken” as our June Ageless Style Link Up theme I was like, “hell yeah”! I decided that I was going to break as many fashion rules as possible in one outfit without going over the top. Let’s dissect my outfit, shall we?
- The shorts. The shorts actually break a few rules. First of all, they’re shredded (which by now we all know is my preferred way of wearing denim). For whatever reason, some people seem to feel that ripped denim is best left to the kids. Why? No clue. If ripped denim isn’t something you like, that’s cool. However, it is something I love and there is no good reason why I shouldn’t wear it. Second, they are shorter than a woman over a certain age should be wearing. Screw that…if I want to show off my dimply legs that’s my business. I do typically wear longer shorts, but I like ’em short too and that’s that.
- The top. A strappy silky cami that looks like it could be underwear? Yes, please. I love silk cami’s and have quite a few. Visible bra straps? Again, yes. I have a ton of lacy bralettes that I wear with the express purpose of showing off the straps. None of them really worked with this so I went with a basic black bra because I wanted the contrast between the red and black. And red-haired girls (or pink-haired girls) shouldn’t wear red? Obviously not an issue.
- The sandals. Heels with shorts? Oh, the scandal! Do I wear heels with shorts on a daily basis? No…I’m definitely a Birks girl. Do I wear heels with shorts if I’m going somewhere special. Yup. And there’s not a damn thing wrong with it.
While this particular outfit might not be for you, that’s okay. The point is…
“Do not limit yourself, do not stifle who you are, just because you think that you have to follow some “rule” that is meant only to hold women back from confidently expressing who they are.”
THE TIP
The easiest place to start rebelling (at least in my opinion) is through fashion. Wear what you want, when you want, how you want. Be brave, be bold; wear something that you’ve always wanted to, but some silly “rule” has always stopped you. You’ll be surprised at the freedom and confidence you’ll feel just by following through with that one little rebellion. And after that? Your options are endless…
THE LINK UPS
Check out the weekly link ups I participate in for even more fashion and style ideas… BE SURE TO SCROLL DOWN AND LINK UP WITH MYSELF AND MY LOVELY CO-HOSTS FOR THIS MONTHS AGELESS STYLE LINK UP!!
Kimono: Walmart (Similar); Shorts: American Eagle (Similar); Cami: Nordstrom; Sandals: JCPenney (Similar)
Amy ~ Amy’s Creative Pursuits Blog, Facebook, Instagram, Google+, Pinterest
Bettye ~ Fashion Schlub Blog, Facebook, Instagram, YouTube
Daenel ~ Living outside the stacks Blog, Instagram, Pinterest, Twitter
Debbie ~ Fashion Fairy Dust Bloglovin, Blog, Instagram, Pinterest, Facebook, Twitter
Jennie ~ A Pocketful of Polka Dots Blog, Instagram, Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter, Bloglovin
Jodie ~ Jodie’s Touch of Style Blog, Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, Bloglovin, Twitter
Julia ~ When the Girls Rule Blog, Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram
Kellyann ~ This Blonde’s Shopping Bag Blog, Instagram, Bloglovin, Twitter
Shelly ~ The Queen in Between Blog, Instagram, Bloglovin, Pinterest, Facebook
Shugunna ~ Nzuri N* Simplicity Blog, Pinterest, Instagram
